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Chapter 15

I flung my arms around him and kissed him so tenderly.
‘Thank you.’ I gasped.

Oliver agreeing to our return was such a sweet and generous offer,however there was still a question mark hanging over us.Will the return be the saviour to our crumbling marriage? I know that there’s nothing left between Lord Henry and I but the journey to the lakeside was so hard.I was kidding myself that this would be easy for me.Marianna was so right,I should never have agreed to be Louisa’s Matron of Honour.
Today I was going to witness two hearts being bound together in love.After Lord Henry and Louisa say the words ‘I do.’ then nothing will be the same again.Innocence is no longer a friend of mine.I have nobody but myself to blame for have brought this upon myself.Gisele Rickman you have to remain strong steadfast, and somehow repair the pieces of this broken heart.I look at Louisa,you did this for her,sacrified your love for Benjamin for her moment to bask in the glorious sun.Louisa glided like an angel,she looked like a goddess in her wedding gown.Beautiful candles lit up her path,as she made her way towards Lord Henry.Harps were playing in the background,sent shivers down my spine.Lord Henry turned to gaze at his beautiful bride as she was reunited with him at the alter.
Benjamin whispered in Louisa’s ear. ‘Louisa you look beautiful.’ He turned and casually gazed over in my direction,it started to get overwhelming.How did it come to this? I looked down,the scene that was unfolding was heartbreaking to watch,pulling at my heartstrings.I simply couldn’t bare it,I don’t want to hurt nobody,but my heart was screaming out in pain.No Gisele,you can’t just walk away from the gentleman that truly makes you happy.As soon as the words,if you know any reason why these two shouldn’t be joined in lawful impediment…you’ve got to find the inner strength within you,stand up for what you believe in and say ‘I object!’
‘We are gathered together to witness the marriage of Benjamin and Louisa,if you know any reason why these two shouldn’t be joined together in any lawful impediment,speak now or forever hold your piece…’
‘No! I object!’
It fell deadly silent,the whole of versailles society’s eyes were fixed upon me.My heart was pounding so fast,sweat running from my brow.My blood ran cold.Louisa looked over in my direction with sheer horror written across her face, ‘Gisele? What are you doing?’
Butterflies were fluttering in my stomach,I felt sick as I know had Louisa’s full attention,she looked on.I was in a deadly dilemma,thoughts were running through my head.I can’t back out of this now.Should I divert all attention and pretend to faint at the alter,after all that’s the effect Benjamin is having on me.Oh come on Gisele,you aught to be ashamed of yourself,swooning in public,is more Evangaline and Holly’s style,child’s play.
‘Lord Henry isn’t the gentleman you think he is.’
‘Gisele.’
‘No Benjamin I think it’s time everyone knew the true nature of our relationship?’
‘Sweet pea,have you been indulging yourself in french champagne.I know it’s christmas but…’
‘And so what if I have Oliver,that is not your concern.’
‘Don’t listen to a word she’s saying she’s striken with grief.’
‘Hold your tongue Oliver,stop making excuses for me.And what if I am grieving? It hasn’t clouded my conscience,this secret has been a heavy burden to me for so long.The truth about Benjamin and I,Oliver I haven’t been completely honest with you,and with that I’m sorry.Lord Henry and I haven’t always seen eye to eye there’s no secret in that.I hold my hands up and confess that I haven’t given him an easy time.At times I didn’t want this wedding to take place.That all changed when I lost William and my best friend he held me all night…’
‘Benjamin is this true?’
‘If it is then he has a lot to answer for,who do you think you are keep your hands off my wife!’
‘Lord Rickman I assure you there’s nothing going on between Lady Rickman and I,Louisa don’t listen to a word she’s saying,she’s a fantasist,it’s all in her head.It’s finally happend the woman’s gone completely mad!’
‘How dare you speak about my wife like that,wait until I get my hands on you! I will kill you!’
I pulled Lord Rickman back,my hands were shaking,I can see the look of anger in his eyes.He knows the truth of our relationship,he’s aware of our kiss.What have I done? I have got to play this down. ‘…No,not in that way Louisa? Lord Henry and I how absurd? I’m sorry Louisa but Lord Henry is in love with his reflection I laughed to myself at this. ‘…I have no time for vain gentleman…I object to your marriage taking place without the forgiveness of Lord Henry.’
‘Is this true sweet pea, look me in the eye and promise me that there isn’t anything going on?’
‘I cross my heart…I’m trying to have you as I reguard Louisa as a sister and I was only trying to protect her best interests.I would like to thank you for providing a shoulder to cry on,in my time of need.For these past few weeks,I’ve been living living on a knife edge.You caught me before I fell,you saved me.’
‘I forgive you Lady Rickman.’
‘Thank you.’ I cleared my throat. ‘Pray do continue.’
I stepped back,I didn’t have strength within me to rip Louisa’s world apart.Maybe I wanted to be free and confess all in front of everyone.Say the words Lord Henry has been longing to hear. ‘Lord Henry I adore and love you with my whole heart,I would walk on water and fire through you just to hold you in my arms one last time.’But it could have gone two ways for Lord Henry to confess his love to say I love you too Lady Rickman and for our whole affair to be revealed,or for what to go horribly wrong and say that I was completely out of my mind.I look at Oliver and remembered his sacrifice,he had made before the ceremony.I just couldn’t go through with it.
Lord Benjamin and Louisa turned to face one another,holding their palms together
‘Louisa,I have been pondering over these words for so long.You know I’m not very good at this.I’m trembling at this very moment…I love you,we were meant to meet on the night of my versaille’s ball,it took a while to capture your heart.I’m enchanted by your beauty.I’m so glad that you agreed to becoming my wife.’
‘Throughout my life,I’ve always thought was second best,partly blamed for my brother for bringing Gisele into our lives….thinking I’ll never live up to this exotic sweet natured creature.I stopped believing in,until you walked into my life.I know I can be neurotic and controlling at times,but I wanted everything about our day to be perfect.I love you,with my my whole heart.I love you my Lord Henry.’
They exchanged rings and the announcement that they were Lord and Lady Henry.They kissed for what seemed like a lifetime,they held hands and made there way to the archway.I slipped away as they were having photographs taken.Lord Benjamin looked deeply into Louisa’s eyes just like he used to be when we were alone together.They released six beautiful white doves into the air and from that moment I knew I’ve lost my precious Ben forever.
I had to be alone with my thoughts,on a day like today I miss my Mama and sister’s so much.I wish Carl was here to hold me in his arms,kiss my thoughts away and tell me that everything was going to be all right and that Lord Henry wasn’t worth all of this heartache.It’s been such a strange christmas day.Not long till I’m back in London and surrounded by my family and friends once more.I sat down beside the lakeside teardrops falling onto the watersedge,I looked on and saw the swans gliding so graciously over the surface. Gazed in at my reflection, all I could see staring back was a broken woman,where was that spritely Gisele? Vanished just like all of my lost memories.
‘Gisele?’
I looked up ‘Oh it’s you?’
‘Louisa is asking for you,she would like a picture taken alongside her Matron of Honour.’
‘I didn’t think I was needed.’
‘Of course you’re needed Gisele.’
‘Go back to your bride Lord Henry.’
‘When did my Gisele get so cold?’
‘I’m no longer yours Lord Henry.’
‘I wanted to thank you for not telling Louisa about us.’
‘I didn’t do it for you Lord Benjamin.I was that close…waiting anxious in the dark for those words if there’s any reason why these two shouldn’t be married for any lawful impediment.I wanted to tell everyone so much,I could fall apart….’
‘So many things I’m going to miss about us,how I could kiss your sweet lips and hold your hands as we lay there for what seems like hours.Staring at you as you lay asleep,comforting you as you call out my name in the dark when you’re having a bad dream,what stopped you?’
‘You would have denied all knowledge,made out that the picture I painted was a lie.That it was all in my head.Then where will that have left me? Left picking up the pieces of my broken marriage.I would have lost my husband’s trust completely.I thought you aught to be the first to know Oliver and I are moving back to London,you will never see me again.’
‘No,I can’t allow that to happen.’
‘You no longer have any control or power over me Lord Henry,you have a wife…I can’t do this anymore.’ I kissed him on the cheek and walked away.

Merry Christmas Sophia,
Oh I miss you so,
Today hasn’t been the same without you.
It’s been one of the hardest days of my life.
I’d like to apologise for my recent behaviour,it’s
just I was so angry with Daniel,I simply
can not believe he would defend Lady Rose’s honour,
over one of his oldest friends.I mean he barely knows
her.He certainly knows her to press my buttons.
I honestly don’t know how you put up with him Sophia
you must have the patience of a saint?
I’m writing to confirm Lord Henry,he’s finally did it,he’s
got married to Louisa,the ceremony only happend a few
moments ago.
I must confess as I write to you,I’m secretly battling with my
feelings for him.I know what you must be thinking?
Gisele you’re a married woman,you should no longer
be pining after Lord Henry’s affections.
But I’m only human,I happily holdmy hands up and confess
I’m struggling.
After everything we’ve been through,losing our son
I aught to grow up and behave myself.I had the
opportunity to confess my deadly sin at the
alter,but I just couldn’t go through with it.
I just want Carl to be here and take this pain
away,but I can’t because he’s dead.That’s what
happens to everyone I truly love and respect,
they all abandon me in the end.
I thought you’d be the first to know Oliver and I
are moving back to London.Yes I know I can’t
believe he’s agreed to it.
I shall tell you more about it on our return.
Your friend
Gisele.

I stepped into the hall were the banquet was taking place,it was decked from top to bottom in blue winter rose and peagreen flowers.I didn’t wish to be here,I longed to spend my day beside a log fire in truth with Lord Henry.But now that’s only an illusion.I long to spend my christmas day,enjoying my daughters company.Surrounded only by people who truly mattered to me,singing carols.When Lord Rickman and I first got married our first christmas together was so magical,before it all went wrong before he was taken away from me and Duke Matthew raped me.He serenaded me,it was so perfect like we were the only two people in the room.Back then he loved me so much,and I adored him there was nothing that I wouldnt do for him,walk over hot coals just to be with him.Oh how I long to revisit those days and not feel like the way I do now feeling trapped and repressed,feasting on fine food and wine.Exchanging small talk with strangers I didn’t care a jot for.Constantly biting my tongue,pretending that I’m ok with the whole situation.Everyone was gathered around the grand table,laughter echoed around the room.Louisa looked radiant,sat next to Benjamin,her beautiful new husband,so blissfully happy.
I couldn’t help but envy her over her new found happiness.I felt like Juliet when she first thought Romeo was dead? a dagger ripped through my heart,was Benjamin my one true Romeo and I’ve left it too late? And now I shall never know,it shall remain only a mystery to me.I can’t believe I almost tore her whole world apart wih four little words.This was the first time I was thrust into the world of Lord Henry finally introduced to his mysterious family.Lord and Lady Robert and Darcie Henry were looking on at their son and admiring his new bride proudly.His brother Arthur was unable to attend,as he had business to attend else where.I had the displeasure of sitting alongside his sister Lady Ana.
‘Louisa looks pretty as a picture doesn’t she?’
I lost my train of thought.
‘Yes,he certainly does.’I smiled.
‘I’m sorry to have startled you I didn’t intend to.’
‘As My Mama would say,serves yourself right for daydreaming,get your head from out of the clouds dear child.’
‘Sounds harsh?’
‘That’s my Mama for you,she’s harmless her barks far worse than her bite.’
‘You must be the famous Lady Rickman,daughter of french aristocrat Lady Antoinette and the late Lord William.I know them by reputation of course.Lady Ana Henry,it’s a pleasure to meet you at long last.Benjy’s told me so much about you?’
‘All good I hope?’ I blushed a little.
Oh please Lord don’t say Lord Henry,has gotten himself in an unfit indulging in fine wine and unintentionally confessed all on the day of his wedding and confided in his sister? Wine is the root of all evil,this shall be our downfall.This is it,I’m finished,my heart is racing as I picture Lord Henry kissing me for the very last time on Christmas eve,his hands all over my body.I grasped onto the necklace he gave me for dear life.I’m shaking at the thought of his touch.I’m drifting away revisiting the time we made love in the stables.The moment soon passes me by.
‘You pulled off quite a remarkable display in the wedding ceremony.Pray do forgive me,but some might say judging from your irrational behaviour and tear stained eyes? You hold a candle to my brother’s heart?’
‘I don’t know what to say?’
‘And judging by the way he looked at you,I say he feels the same way?’
‘We shared a moment that is all…Please Lady Ana,do not tell a soul I beg of you.But if any of this got out it would cause scandal to my family and destroy my marriage.Lord Oliver and I are only just getting back on our feet.A few weeks ago we tragically lost our son.’
‘I had no idea.’
‘Lord Benjamin,your brother was simply a shoulder to cry on,when I felt my whole future slip through my fingers and when I thought my husband turned his back on me,nothing more.’
‘Grief makes you do the strangest things,you’re secret’s safe with me Lady Rickman.’
‘Thank you,Lady Henry.’
‘Please call me Ana Gisele,I think we’re more alike than you think?’
‘I hardly believe you’ve made the same mistakes as I have?’
‘I was due to be married to a young gentleman an Earl David Wheately,he adored me,would do absolutely anything for me and there was a time when I would have did the same thing.Things started to change when I encountered a beautiful stranger a Sir Declan Holmes he changed my life,promised me the whole earth.
My blood ran cold Declan,why does his name always come back to haunt me? Why can I never escape him after all these years can I never escape him.
‘…I left a note on the day of my wedding telling David that I’d left him for Declan,we we’re going to start a new life together he disappeared,I never thought I’d see him again that is until the day he turned up at Lord Benjamin’s masquerade ball.I found him in the arms of…’
‘Louisa.’
‘How did you know?’
‘I was there Ana I’m so sorry.’
‘I sacrified my true happiness for the sake of a moments delight.Is something wrong my dear?’
‘Nothing Lady Henry.’
‘No Lady Rickman you can not fool me,when I mentioned Sir Holmes name it looked like someone had walked over your grave?’
‘You’re not the only one to have fallen for the charms of Sir Holmes.I was young and naive,when I married Lord Rickman I was only twenty one,so sure of myself at the time but still learning about the world.In my eyes Lord Oliver wasn’t behaving like a husband aught to,away on business or clay pigeon shooting.A husband should be there to see to his newly wedded wives needs,he simply abandoned me.So I sought comfort in another man’s arms and Sir Declan satisfied my needs.I wasn’t sorry at the time,our affair tore our whole family apart,I was cut off from the Delessop fortune but I didn’t need money I could survive on my love for Declan,then it all went wrong.’
‘He abandoned you?’
‘No I left Declan,I discovered that I was carrying Oliver’s child,I gave up my love for my chance of survival and in time I fell in love with Lord Rickman once more,Esme and Ava have changed my whole view on life.We have been through so much together crumbling of our marriage,losing our son.Nothing could tear us apart,the truth is despite our faults and differences true love never dies.That is why Oliver mustn’t discover the truth it would destroy him.One day Ana,a beautiful girl like you will find your true happiness when you’re least expecting it,just like I have.’ I lied.

Our conversation was soon interrupted Lord Robert stood up to deliver his speech. ‘I’d like to thank you all for joining us on this joyious occasion.Finally my son has made an honest woman out of Lady Louisa.I’d like to welcome you to the Henry family at long last.Louisa,I’m relieved that you have agreed to marry him,I feared that he would remain all alone in his big empty estate for the rest of his living days.But for the night of his masquerade ball,you changed everything.A toast to the beautiful bride Lady Henry.’
‘Lady Henry.’
‘And finally to Gisele the beautiful Matron of honour.Louisa has spoken so highly of you,how you’ve stood by her through everything and to my beautiful Ana.You make a beautiful bridesmaid,one day I pray it will be your day,now I believe my son Lord Benjamin would like to say a few words.’
‘I would like to thank you all for coming today,it’s overwhelming to see how much support Louisa and I have Louisa what can I say? The day you walked into my life you turned it upside down,but all for the better.Seeing you today,you simply took my breathe away.I couldn’t be more happier,I can’t wait to build my future with you,and yes Mama that does include grand children.’
This is so unfair,those last few words got to me slightly I would kill to be the mother to his children,my heart is aching. I feel this aught to be my wedding day,he doesn’t mean those words to Louisa,there meant for me.I pushed him away and forced him into an unloved marriage.He truly loves me,I know he does.’
‘Louisa you look so beautiful today,I know I don’t say it as often as I aught to but I love you with whole heart.Let us all raise a glass to my beautiful wife,to the bride Lady Louisa Henry.’
‘Lady Louisa Henry.’
Oh please he may fool everyone with his public display of affection but he can’t fool me.The marriage won’t last five minutes,the sooner I’m back in London for the better then I don’t have to witness it for myself.Poor Louisa she won’t know what’s hurt her when she discovers her husband’s true colours,she should have got out of this while she still had the chance.
Oliver walked over and greeted his sister with a kiss upon her cheek.
‘You look so beautiful Louisa.’
‘Thank you Oliver.’ she smiled.
‘You will be happy living in Versailles won’t you?’
‘I wish you didn’t have to return to London.’
‘You could come with us?’
‘Oliver I’m not little girl any more,you don’t have to protect me anymore.My heart is in Versailles were my Benjamin is….You will make Gisele happy again won’t you?’
‘I don’t think I know her anymore Louisa,I’m scared I’m losing her.’
‘Gisele is still hurting over losing William,she still blames herself.’
Oliver shakes Benjamin’s hand ‘Congratulations Lord Henry.’
‘Thank you Lord Rickman.’ he smiled.
‘Look after my little sister won’t you?’
‘Oliver.’
‘I’m sorry I can’t help but feel protective over you Louisa.’
‘You have my word Lord Rickman.’
Lady Darcie walked over and introduced herself.
‘Lady Darcie Henry pleased to make your acquaintance?’
‘It’s a pleasure to meet you at long last Lady Henry.’
‘Louisa has told me so much about you,my you have led a colourful life?’
‘Nobody is perfect Lady Henry.I have did so many things that I am not proud of,but that’s a thing of the past.’
‘I admire your honesty Lady Rickman.’
‘Thank you.’ I smiled.
‘I believe you took Lady Louisa under your wing?’
‘Yes,ever since her brother and I became engaged we had a recognition with one another,she barely had any friends in London.I became rather protective over her.I’m not afraid to admit that we haven’t always seen eye to eye.’
‘Over Sir Holmes I do believe?’
‘Lord Rickman and I haven’t always had a fairytale marriage,I was young and I fear I rushed into marriage too soon,Sir Holmes was the living proof to that theory.I believed I was going to marry him,he destroyed my whole family.I soon woke up to my senses when I was left with nothing and carrying his child.’
‘Ava and Esme are a credit to you both.’
‘Esme isn’t Oliver’s,he raised her as his own.We do not speak of Esme’s father.’
‘I couldn’t agree with you more Lady Gisele,vile man that he is.I’m ever so sorry to hear about your friend Carl and losing your son on the same night.’
‘Thank you.’
‘How are you coping my child?’
‘I have good days and bad.’
‘I admire you’re strength Lady Rickman.’

A little while later,I looked on Lord Benjamin and Louisa waltzed on the ballroom for their wedding dance.I felt green with envy,as he gently held her waist whispering sweet nothings into her ear.
‘I can not wait till I get you alone,happy christmas Lady Louisa Henry.’
He tenderly kissed her. ‘We wil be happy won’t we Benjy?’
‘We will make a life in Versailles?’
‘You meant what you said about the prospect of children?’
‘What you thought that was all a front to please my Mama?’
‘I still get the impression Lady Darcie doesn’t like me very much?’
‘Mama adores you,and I meant it with my whole heart.’
‘I fear Ana hasn’t forgiven me for what happend with Declan.’
‘Ana is her own worst enemy,she realises that she had her chance of happiness and she threw it all away,she’s a pussycat when you get to know her.You do trust me don’t you Louisa?’
‘You know I do.’

I rest my elbow upon the table watching the world go by,I really should be with my children right now.
‘May I have this dance?’
I looked up standing by was Lord Oliver,holding out his hand.
‘Ever the romantic.’
‘I thought you looked lonely there?’
‘I thought you’d never ask Lord Rickman.’
I curtised him to humour him.’Thank you my noble Lord.’
He took hold of my palm and led me onto the ball room floor,taking me in hold.
‘Won’t long till we’ll be back in London and all of this will just be a distant memory.’
‘Is this you’re way of trying to change my mind?’
‘Not all all Lady Rickman.’
‘Not so close.’ I smiled.
‘I thought you liked a bit of close work?’ tease Oliver.
‘You know I do.’ I blushed a little. ‘But now is not the time or place Olly.’
‘Since when has my wife become so frigid?’
‘That is such an awful thing to say Oliver.’
‘I’m sorry if the truth hurts Gisele,but you know that I’m right.’
‘I’ve changed Gisele.’
‘And not for the better,you’ve gone from the fiery temptress that I adore,to a timid little mouse.Have you been avoiding me,you’ve barely spent a moment alone with me?’
‘Whatever you gave you that impression?’
‘The way you were smiling with Lady Ana earlier?’
‘I was merely being polite,I was circulating something you aught to do…’
‘Gisele why are acting so cold?’
‘Seeing Lord Benjamin and Louisa today has got me thinking.’
‘I hope all of that thinking didn’t hurt your pretty little blonde brain.’
‘Since when did you got so patronising,It got me thinking about us and our wedding and how we used to be.We couldn’t keep our hands off one another when we were first engaged now look at us? I feel as though we’re drifting apart.’
‘You’re parly to blame Gisele.’
‘Excuse me?’
‘You’re behaving like a stranger towards me,not like my wife.You used to be so warm and affectionate,craving for my touch.Now you squirm at the thought of my touch.’
I pulled out of hold from Lord Rickman.
‘I know you’re still traumatised over the loss of your son and Carl.’
‘Please don’t bring Carl up in our quarrell Oliver.’
‘Why,I know he’s the love of you’re life Gisele and I will never measure up to his standards?’
‘Now’s not the time to be discussing this matter.’
‘I can’t see you denying it! You’re my wife Lady Rickman I don’t like to be kept in the dark!’
‘The truth is maybe I don’t want to be your wife anymore and maybe I don’t love you! Please excuse me I’m tired and I long to see my children.’
I walked upstairs and found my children sleeping so peacefully like angels,where have my babies gone? They have blossomed into beautiful sweet little girls. ‘Mama has put you through so much in your short little lives.Esme and Ava,I’m so sorry for the heartache and trauma I’ve caused you.I promised you a world of happiness,a life time of love.But all I’ve inflicted upon you is heartache and pain.I’m so sorry,I did everything out of love for you.’ I kissed them on their foreheads. ‘Sleep tight my little angels,Mama loves you so so much.’
I gently closed the door behind them,I didn’t wish to disturb them.I made my way into the bedchamber.I was staying in to lay my head upon the crisp satin sheets.I started to cry into the pillow,oh come on Gisele it would break Mama’s heart if she could see you this way.I just long for her to cuddle me.I wiped my tears away. ‘No more crying.’ I attempted to remove my Maid of honour gown.My head is spinning from the amount of champagne I’ve had.I can’t conscentrate.Maybe I had overreacted with Oliver,I can not believe how beastly I was towards him.Why did I say I didn’t love him anymore? Those words must be killing him.Maybe I could write a sweet note and try and make it up to him? There was a knock upon the door.Maybe it’s my husband,coming to apologise,how dare he say I’m still in love with Carl.He’s dead for heaven’s sake he can not defend himself.No I refuse to make the first move.I opened the door and I was shocked to see my midnight visitor,standing in front of me was Lord Henry.
‘Lord Henry?’
‘Aren’t you going to invite me in?’
I reluctantly nodded my head,and he closed the door. ‘Shouldn’t you be with your bride right now?’
‘Today has been so perfect Lady Rickman,Louisa looked so beautiful,but she’s not you.’
‘Can I stop you there Lord Henry,I’m flattered but forbid me If I’m being rude but I think we’ve both indulged in a bit too much french champagne….I think it’s best that you leave,before you say something that you will regret in the morning.’
‘I see you’re wearing my gift.’
‘It’s beautiful I refuse to take it it.’
‘What does Lord Rickman think about your mysterious gift?’
‘Lord Oliver,thinks it’s a gift from my sister Marianna and it shall stay that way.’
Lord Henry sat down on the bed beside me. ‘Why didn’t you stop me?’
‘I tried,you know I did.’
‘Why not Lady Gisele?’
‘You know why Benjamin?’
He gently touched my chin,I turned away from him. ‘Please don’t.’
‘Do you still love me?’
‘You know I do,your sister knows about us.’
‘Ana? How?’
‘She guessed,I said that it was a sheer moment of madness,I was blinded by grief.She swore she wouldn’t tell a soul.’ I cleared my throat. ‘She told me that she was involved with Sir Holmes,she was heartbroken when he abandoned her only to discover him in the arms of your wife?’
‘Louisa sensed that Ana disliked her,now it’s beginning to make sense now.’
‘Why are you here talking to me,this is your wedding night?’
‘I want to be with you Gisele.’
‘No.’
‘You say you love me Gisele,but you keep pushing me away and you keep me begging for more.You could have put a stop to this in the wedding ceremony,confessed about us?’
‘You swore blind that there was nothing going on?’
Lord Benjamin looked down at the ring upon his finger. ‘This ring doesn’t mean a thing to me,it’s supposed to mean that I’m bound forever to Louisa,that nothing will tare our love apart.I have lied in the eyes of the god.’
‘I didn’t think you had a faith Lord Henry,are you mocking me?’
‘You know I’m not,I feel like such a fraud.’
‘I promised Oliver that I would look after Louisa,I couldn’t look in the eye.’
‘I’m so ashamed,what’s become of us? All of this lieing and deceiving? Lady Isabelle was right about me.’
‘No.’
‘I’m sorry but it’s true,she said I would break Oliver’s heart again and I’ve gone and proved her right.’
‘It should have been us standing at the alter,making those promises together.’
‘Our love is based upon lies.’
‘I refuse to believe that Gisele.’
‘I’m with Oliver.’
‘I saw you together,you don’t love him?’
‘The truth is I loathe him.’
‘Why are you still with a gentleman who makes you unhappy?’
‘You know why for the sake of Esme and Ava,If It wasn’t for them then maybe I might of broke free of our marriage long ago.’
‘Are you still insisting on going to London with him.’
‘I’ve got no choice Ben.’
‘Oh Gisele.I’ve barely been married a day and just cant get you out of my system,Lady Rickman you intoxicate me.’
Lord Benjamin started to kiss me,he started to unfasten my gown,he removed his shirt.
‘I’ve been longing to do that all day.’
He started to kiss my neck. ‘I’ve missed you.’
‘I know.’
We moved back on the bed,how I’ve missed his touch.His warm hands touching my skins,his fingers running gently through my hair.His sweet lips touching mine once more,I closed my eyes.His hands moved down to my waist,I stopped abruptly. ‘I can’t do this.’
‘Gisele?’
‘No.’ I sat it. ‘It’s so wrong.’
‘We’re so right together.’
‘You’re a married man Ben.’
‘You’re a worried woman mil Lady,it’s never stopped you before?’
‘It’s not right,you should be sprinkling rose petals and making sweet love to your new bride.Not with me.’
‘I want you so badly.’
‘And I you.’ I touched his face,tears rolled down my cheeks.
‘Please stop crying Gis.’ Benjamin removed the tears from my cheeks. ‘I will find a way for us to be together.’
‘The sooner I return to London,then I can stop hurting.Please leave Benjamin.’
©Sarahcarty2013.wordpress.com

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